Break the Chain The Tale of the Tape

Created 4/18/2003 (4/18/2003) Though e-mail lacks the checks and balances that make the traditional media reliable and valid, many people still rely upon it as a news medium. This letter has roots in an even more unreliable form of journalism: A drive-time radio comedy program.


Duct Tape Lawsuit

Man Sues Tom Ridge Over Duct Tape Fears

Corona, CA IF. Tom Ridge's advice to Americans to stock up on duct tape and plastic has sparked a lawsuit which has been filed against him, the Department of Homeland Security and President George W. Bush.

Steven J. Bosell, the owner of B & B Construction in Corona, California, has filed a lawsuit claiming emotional distress, personal injury and sexual dysfunction after he wrapped his "privates" in duct tape to protect them from a biological attack.

"After watching Mr. Ridge on television advising us to stock up on duct tape and plastic, I went to the local Costco and bought $100 worth of duct tape to protect myself", Bosell said. "When I got home, I taped up my windows and doors. After I did that I realized if survivors like myself are going to reproduce and populate the Earth after a biological attack, we have to protect our privates as well."

Bosell claimed in his lawsuit he wrapped his "privates" in duct tape as test of "Homeland Security". When he tried to remove the tape, Bosell injured himself when the tape began peeling off skin and body hair. After calling an ambulance, Bosell was taken to the hospital where the doctors and nurses laughed at him.

"I told the doctors and nurses at the hospital if they laughed, I would file a lawsuit against them and the hospital. They laughed anyways and I now have another lawsuit pending" Bosell said with tears streaming down his face. "They went out their way to make me look like a fool. Once I saw the doctors scalpel go toward my privates, I totally lost it and blacked out."

Also named in the lawsuit is the President of the United States, George W. Bush. "President Bush is just as liable for injury to my reproductive future because he hired Mr. Ridge to run the Department of Homeland Security and Mr. Ridge gave the nation bad advice. They also make me look like a fool." Bosell sobbed.

The Department of Homeland Security and the Bush Administration have no comment on Mr. Bosell's lawsuit.

I truly believe this man was put on this earth to serve as an example of what can go wrong when someone born with no brain, can have access to the legal system.


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Strip a "stranger-than-fiction" story from its proper context and it's amazing how many people will mistake it for legitimate news. This origin of this story is similar to that of the venerable Harry Potter Promotes Satanism chain Letter that first surfaced in 2002. Both were originally offered as humor, but, once removed from their source, looked just as believable as anything else in our inboxes.

Steven J. Bosell of B & B Construction in Corona, California, is the creation of comedian Phil Hendrie. Bosell is one of a cast of dozens of wacky characters that Hendrie regularly interviews on his nationally syndicated weekday afternoon program. The Bosell character (voiced by Hendrie) frequently speaks of frivilous lawsuits he has filed, usually on subjects yanked directly from the headlines. Break this chain.

What Do You Think?

Category: No Joke Too Obvious
References: The Phil Hendrie Show, Steven Bosell's Lawsuits (fan site)

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